One step forward ...

This weekend was going to be it. The Beast had started last week albeit with the points distributor. All I had to do was get the fuel pump fixed properly and the seats in. Then it was going to Phil's for an MOT. Groovy.

Or perhaps not so groovy. The fuel pump is in. It is not leaking and is pumping away. It's damned noisy though as I haven't fixed it on to a rubber mounting. It will need doing but not an important thing at the moment. There we are then - a "new" distributor, a new coil, a new fuel pump, lots of new wires, clamps and leads, a reconditioned starter motor - feck all happened! There was not a v8 burble anywhere - just the metallic noise of the fuel pump rattling at the rear bulkhead and a dying battery straining under the constant pressure of this dungheap never ever starting.

Then Stewart/Stuart arrived. Huzzah, I am saved! Or not as the case was as he had to run off. He has put the original electrical distributor in and has tested the wires. But still nout happened. Although it could now be the interior gubbins of the distributor. How do I know if these ones that were replaced last week actually work? Can I have my old gubbins back please?!

To top it all, there is now another problem. Whilst cranking and trying to start it, it obviously flooded. It was at this point that I could hear a trickling and smell fuel. It wasn't coming out of the bit that we (thanks to Simon for his fuel pump assistance and trips to B&Q) had changed. It was coming from the engine. It was coming from the carbs. It was pouring from a pipe from the carbs straight on to the block! This site suggests it is a safety measure. I would love to meet the bellend who designed that "safety" measure. Although in my case, it is perfectly safe as the engine never runs thus the block will never be hot enough to ignite the leaky fuel. The MG site has suggested that the needle is blocked with some dung (possible as I drained the fuel into a (cleanish) plastic bowl) or that one of the floats is buggered, which could be due to the fact that an engine has not been started for a while (no shit!).

Previously I had a car that wouldn't get up a very small hill as the fuel pump was no good. Now I am paddling in a lake of unleaded as the fuel pump is too good. Cock! In conclusion therefore, today and probably for the rest of the week, Rover v8's are dung, Harris Mann is a tosser, BL/Rover deserved to go bust and TR7s are the worst cars ever made. The white flag is raised once more.

Thanks be to Paul

Following various messages of encouragement on here and elsewhere, I decided to give the Beast a last chance. On Saturday, I approached Paul in the hope that he had a spare distributor lying around. He had, but it was one with points as opposed to electronic ignition. Fear not, a trip to Bewdley to his mate Pete was called for

Pete just happened to have a box of Lucas distributors lying around , all in various states of (dis)repair. We transferred the potentially buggered innards of my dis with those from one of the others. I also borrowed one of those ballast resistor box things too. 2 hours later, time to put the plan into action.

Cock! The gear on the oil pump had moved and the dis wouldn't go in. A temporary blip though as Paul created a oil pump mover tool thing from a huge bolt and an angle grinder. The dis was put in. The cables were recrimped and reconnected to the coil and resistor. all connected. The key was turned ... COOOOOOOOOOOOOCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK! At this point, you may have worked out that all was not well. We waggled and pulled and disconnected and reconnected but to no avail. That's it then. The Beast is going back on eBay for as much as I can get.

It was at this point that Paul decided to fit the points dis ...

Lager! The Beast lives!

I Surrender

An update for all those of you who still bother to read this sorry tale: it's still fucked! I have tested the spark using some glow end cap things. I have sparks. I then tested the spark with a spark strength tester thing that looks a bit like a compass. The spark strength tester thing suggested the spark was too weak. So, what produces the spark? The coil. It can't be the distributor as that just distributes the spark surely? I purchased a new coil. Typically, it made fuck all difference. That was about 2 weeks ago. I have been nowhere near the sack of crap since. I can't be arsed. I loathe and detest it. No wonder TR7's are universally ridiculed. No wonder Rover went down the shitter. I raise the white flag in surrender.

Hammerite

The under arches and under body are now nicely Hammerited. It was very rusty in places. There was also alot of filler. I am getting a bit of deja vu from 20 years ago. I hope the MOT man doesn't poke the bottom too hard with his scredriver!

Waste of money?

In the last year, lots of people have suggested to me that I had wasted my money on the Beast. Well, to all of you doubters, it's a very useful way to dry groundsheets and caravan awnings.

The great tune up - my cock!

Hello all. No recent updates as it's fannied again. It's still the Rover part, nothing wrong with the Triumph bits at the moment. The engine has decided to play silly buggers again. Gary (rebuilding a TR7v8) popped over a couple of weekends ago to have a look at the positions of the water hoses on the engine. As he was there, and because he knows a bit about cars, I convinced him to have a "quick" look. 3 hours later, feck all difference - except that the new Facet fuel pump is in. When I say in, it's bodged in the engine bay with lots of jubilee clips and hose pipes rather than on the rear bulkhead where it belongs. I may just add a photo at some stage - if I can be arsed. Until then, here's the pump ...

Next stage then ... to finish off the under sealing. I did the passenger side. It looks quite good actually! Now with the car turned around (thanks to Gary and Simon!), I can get to the other side. As for the engine ... feck knows what to do. I don't think it will be on the road this summer. In fact, I have a nasty feeling that it will live in the garage for a decade before I sell it to Ed for the price of a curry. Cock!

Fiat Panda v Triumph TR8

Went into the garage over the weekend to put the seats in and fanny about with the chewed electrics. I thought I would just give it a test first, and listen to the burbling and popping for inspiration. Bastard!

If I hadn't just spent lots of dough on a Pajero, I would be making use of Coco's scrappage thing and doing this...